Hi everyone. I had an unexpected and somewhat unfortunate opportunity to meet more of my family here in South Africa this past weekend. My friend Magdalene's mother passed suddenly, so I wrote her asking what I could do and mentioning that if she'd like, I could be there as early as Friday. The offer was sincere, but my American background made me anticipate a reply like ... "Thanks for the offer, but why don't you send a covered dish instead?" So I was surprised and touched when Magdalene wrote thanking me for the offer and asking me to come. So I boarded a bus Friday morning and 8 hours later we were hugging in Durban. The first thing I noticed about my sister was how beautiful she is! A round face with round eyes, and two gold teeth with a star on one tooth. In the States, I can't recall having ever entertained the idea of gold teeth, but in Magdalene's Colored community, Wentworth, it's regular to see women with gold ornamentation on their teeth, and it's so very elegant and artistic. Block from your mind the images of Lil John: http://images.google.co.za/imgres?imgurl=http://www.jewelsnob.com/images/liljohngrillz.jpg&imgrefurl=http://www.jewelsnob.com/tacky_bling_bling/&h=295&w=259&sz=18&hl=en&start=6&um=1&tbnid=Rh11PhgkKycDIM:&tbnh=115&tbnw=101&prev=/images%3Fq%3Dlil%2Bjohn%2Bgold%2Bteeth%26svnum%3D10%26um%3D1%26hl%3Den%26sa%3DN

No, no, no. The women I met were wearing more subtle, elegant, and tasteful styles. Picture this: http://images.google.co.za/imgres?imgurl=http://www.saigonsoldier.com/photos/images/Bac_Ha/photo_6.jpg&imgrefurl=http://kayaro.blogspot.com/2004_12_26_archive.html&h=400&w=300&sz=76&hl=en&start=7&um=1&tbnid=N51M4qOqHUvGnM:&tbnh=124&tbnw=93&prev=/images%3Fq%3Dlil%2Bjohn%2Bgold%2Bteeth%26svnum%3D10%26um%3D1%26hl%3Den%26sa%3DN
Typical designs included two gold teeth (not the front 2 teeth but the teeth beside the front ones) ... or an upside-down T shaped gold piece that fit in-between and under the two front teeth ... or a tiny gold star on one tooth. I know it's hard to believe, but had it not been for my friend Brian Khoza (and his warning about possible tooth decay), I might have been having trouble with the metal detectors on the flight back home :) And this is the other interesting thing - Everybody has straight teeth! It's very odd. Bethy and I wore braces for years to straighten ourselves out. I find it difficult to imagine that in communities where families skimp on food that there would be money for braces, so I have yet to figure out how so many people have such perfectly straight teeth. Brian and Magdalene are prime examples. Anyway, so that was my first impression of Magdalene. my second impression was the handsome, handsome boy attached to her hip. Leighston is only 4 but very tall, with the sweetest temperament. When Magdalene sent me to the corner shop to buy Vodacom credit for her cell phone, she asked Leighston to walk with me. He carried a huge stick in the shape of a gun (haha) so we were safe :) My time with the two of them was such a blessing and I really did grow to love them both.

One thing that was really tricky for me was knowing what to say to my friend who had just lost her mother. It was my first time meeting Magdalene and I didn't know how to be a comfort. In that regard, it was interesting to watch how she interacted with her closest girlfriends from the neighborhood. I had thought that laughing or making jokes would be inappropriate given the gravity of her loss, but her closer friends knew better, so in the evenings after prayer meeting and coffee & cookies, her friends would joke on each other and make fun of themselves, and carry on and Magdalene got to think about something else for a little while. It wasn't at all making light of the situation, just making her burden lighter, and I think she appreciated it. The funeral is today, so please pray for Magdalene and Leighston. I left her with my Smokie Norfolk CD.

On my way back to Pretoria, I stopped in Pietermaritzburg to have dinner with friends of Sine's. Sine had already left to go back to Zimbabwe to visit family, so I stayed with her friend Bridget and 2 other girls who are also studying theology at LTI. One of the girls braids hair, so I watched her for a while before venturing to ask if I might braid a piece. She would braid the real hair into longer extensions and then hand it over to me to finish. The braids were tiny, but my work was quality, :) so she offered me a position and we sat in their bedroom braiding and talking for the next hour. And the next morning, Evan's friend Brian Khoza offered to take me on a tour of Pietermaritzburg. I'd been curious to see more of the city, but wouldn't have been willing to do it by myself. But traveling with Brian was a really liberating experience. For anyone who has seen the Pretoria news this morning, the front page article is about how crime in SA is on the rise with the Pretoria CBD (where I work) being the 5th most dangerous place in the country. (Side note: That statistical reality is so difficult to merge with the life and experiences that I have had while here). Anyway, knowing about the crime made me anxious every time I was walking in the streets. Might the next person I walk by mug me? But in Pietermaritzburg it was different. Because Brian knew this neighborhood (Umbali) very well and had friends there, we walked through on what he called the "10 Toe Tour." He kept referring to it as the 'ghetto' but that was so difficult for me to accept because it wasn't full of tiny, cramped cheap housing. No, there were plots of land with houses on them, gates, grass, an informal soccer field where kids were playing, a corner shop where you could buy cold drinks and candy and play video games. And as we approached people, instead of worrying that they might harm me, Brian stopped and shook hands with them and introduced me so these strangers became people ... Mandla, the guy who fought for the ANC and who joked about being on a terrorist watch list ... Brian's mom who served us tea and chided me for waking in the cold air ... the kids who paused from playing video games to stare at me. For some reason I thought that if I just didn't open my mouth, people wouldn't know that I wasn't from there, but when kids kept staring, I asked Brian, "Do I look out of place?" to which he bluntly and honestly replied, "Yes." :) I think it was because of 'big red,' my wool coat, the I washed in the machine and shrunk :) In short, the "Ten Toe Umbali Tour" was a wonderful experience that allowed me to really see the country and get a feel for what it would be like to live there. Finally I got to (as Sine would say) 'rub shoulders with the people.' Shadetree Mechanic, do not stress out. I was being alert and not once did I sense any danger. I promise I'm being careful :) And Brian is a friend of Evan's, a very good guy.

Sad to say, but the 4th of July isn't nearly as popular in the RSA. No barbeque, no fireworks, nothing. Wink :) However, my friend at work (Victoria) has a friend who just got admitted to the law bar, so we are going to go out to eat. Sushi, I think. In honor of my country, I will be saying the pledge of allegiance before I eat. Actually, the US Embassy here in RSA has a July 4th celebration complete with hotdogs and hamburgers and one of those inflatable jumping things for kids. But it's a B.Y.O.P. affair, and I left my passport at home today, so I won't be celebrating with them. Shadetree, Coni, and Elba - eat another rib for me :) Love you all.

Mama Milligan

Everyone, I am back from my visit with Magdalene whose mother passed suddenly last week. I will write more about my time there later, but I just wanted to thank Mama Milligan for this funny, true, email that she sent me ... "I've prayed for your traveling mercies so much til God probably says, 'Yeah, I know, Kristian's going somewhere else'" Haha. Please keep lifting me in prayer that this cold would clear up. Yes, Dad, if need be, I will go to the doctor tomorrow. And remember our sister Magdalene, as it might be harder for her after all the mourners leave and she is left to mourn. I will be seeing her again during the last weke in July. Yes, Dad, if need be, I will go to the doctor tomorrow. Love you all. Bethany, did you cut your hair? and why didn't you consult me first? - Kristian